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  • Writer's pictureJanene Brown

Reset For Intimacy

Weekend Fun

This last weekend was Labor Day weekend! We were full up on plans! From Friday morning to Monday afternoon we were on the go. So amazing how God has orchestrated our lives with new friends, ministry, and our marriage. We spent our weekend running from one event to the next and loved every minute! Our cups were full and we were poured out at the same time. So we needed a reset for intimacy.


A reset for your marriage might be just what you need. A reset is defined as adjusting or setting in a new or different way. To set back to factory reset. Do you remember the day you got married? The love, the hopes and dreams!! Reseting for intimacy in your marriage is something that needs to happen often. We can’t keep going and never adjusting or even trying something new to create intimacy with your spouse. This past weekend we ministered together, we laughed, ate too much good food, and loved spending time with our friends. Even in all of the good times with others we needed some alone time.

Alone Time

We got home after being so blessed, and put our jammies’ on, grabbed a blanket and cuddled up on the couch with our little dog Coco. Brent and I love spending time together, just the two of us. We rested, watched a couple of movies, ate some dinner later, and just had alone time. Intimacy doesn’t have to be some extravagant event, it just has to be a time alone together that you can both reset and have a closeness. Later we read our book and went to bed early for some good rest! Easy Peasy but so good!


Rest is a way to reset for intimacy. Sometimes just sitting and talking, no distractions, or noise, is just what the Doctor ordered. My husband and I sometimes sit out back on our porch and listen to nature. Sometimes we stand out under the stars with his arms wrapped around me, and just have some intimacy looking up at Gods beautiful creation and watch as He shows us a shooting star. Other times we take a walk and plan what is coming next! Intimacy comes in the private moments.


Intimacy happens in private. You don’t get intimacy with lots of people around, you get it in the privacy of your home, or moments alone. Reset your intimacy in the private, with closeness of heart, mind, body, and soul. Have you ever noticed intimacy happens with whispers, and holding each other close? When is the last time you had true intimacy with your spouse. Grab their hand, steal a kiss, rub their back, make a move toward reseting those feelings. Where does intimacy start?

The Secret Place

Reset for intimacy happens in the secret place before it can ever happen in your marriage. I am asked, “How can I have what you have in your marriage?” My answer, “You have to do what we do!” What is it that we do? We put Jesus at the center of our home, marriage, and life! Intimacy starts with putting Jesus first and foremost in life. Spending time with Him, in the secret place praying. Go in and shut the door. I need Jesus, before I need anything or anyone else. IF I don’t spend time with Him, I don’t understand intimacy, and I don’t know how to have it with my husband. Humility, brokenness, being vulnerable, and open before God, so I can do the same before my husband. So when I feel a little off, I know I must go to the secret place and reset.


Tuesday: Genesis 2:18 says, “And the Lord God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him.” Together to be better!

Wednesday: Ephesians 5:28 says, “So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself.” When you see this in the scripture it refers to how we take care of ourselves to nourish our own bodies, and we should do the same for each other.

Thursday: Ephesians 5:31 says, “For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh.” Being alone together is also a time to learn to become one! Enjoy times separate from others.

Friday: Song of Solomon 4:7 says, “Thou art all fair, my love; there is no spot in thee.” Intimacy happens when you rest. You speak to each other differently finding words to compliment each other.

Saturday: 1 Corinthians 7:5 says, “Defraud ye not one the other, except it be with consent for a time, that ye may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again, that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency.” Intimacy in conversation leads to intimacy in private. This intimacy is just as important as the closeness you feel in words and deeds.

Sunday: Psalm 91:1 says, “He that dwelleth in the secret place of the most High shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty.” Read all of Psalm 91. The intimacy you are looking for in your marriage comes out of the intimacy you gain in prayer with God. All the things you desire from your spouse reflects our relationship with Jesus. Closeness, protection, provision, and love.


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Thank you for investing in your marriage and you too can have a happily ever married marriage!!

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