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Marble Surface
  • Writer's pictureJanene Brown

Sarcasm Ruins A Marriage

A Couple Hurt

There once was a couple who was always sarcastic with each other. They would say what an amazing relationship they had, but this marriage ended in divorce. They had date nights, never missed giving of flowers, etc, but they were always making fun of each other and others.


There are several definitions for sarcasm including: ironic or satirical taunt, a sharp remark to cut or criticize. It means to tear the flesh or grind the teeth, or to speak bitterly. To mock the person you are speaking to without saying it directly and in a funny way, yet still cutting them. Why would we do this to anyone, let alone the one we love the most?


The Bible clearly tells us not to let a root of bitterness spring up in our life. Bitterness is the result of anger or disappointment, that turns into resentment, and then bitterness, resulting from an offense that was never forgiven. When we speak to each other with such disregard, we are displaying bitterness.


In marriage forgiveness is imperative! It needs to be done on a daily basis. When you are irritated, disappointed, mad, hurt, broken, or any other offense that comes in marriage, you have to learn to forgive, forget it and move on. Forgiveness is letting the offense and offender go and not holding it to their charge again.

What Happened?

What happened to this couple? Where did they go wrong? First, they didn’t have their foundation built on God. Maybe they went to church, but their hearts weren’t right. They were hurt by each other, things done, not done, past hurts they carried into the marriage that weren’t healed. Whatever the reason, and we can only speculate, but they took these hurts and used sarcasm to hurt the other instead of communicating in love.


Love was definitely missing from this equation! Love covers, it forgives, its long suffering, it keeps no record of wrongs. When love is missing, other things like sarcasm come out! You can’t have sweet and bitter waters come from the same fountain! Love is casting out fear! Many things cause us to cover our hurts with sarcasm. It’s easier, it deflects, it is revenge without the truth being known.

Put It Away

Put away sarcasm far from your marriage! It will wound, hurt, and destroy trust and deplete all good things! When you joke harshly, you destroy the one you say you love. Speak with kindness, speak with love! Don’t get caught up in always thinking you should have a comeback. Examine your heart if you notice sarcasm has started to impede your speech! Put it away quickly and ask for forgiveness, and you will see love come again into your marriage!


Our prayer for you today is love one another with a godly love! God is not sarcastic with us, He is gentle, loving, kind, and even when He disciplines us He does it in love. Praying today you walk in love, keeping your tongue, and learning to communicate in a loving way.


Monday: Galatians 5:15 says, “But if ye bite and devour one another, take heed that ye be not consumed one of another.” Praying today your marriage is not consumed!

Tuesday: Proverbs 12:18 says, “There is that speaketh like the piercings of a sword: but the tongue of the wise is health.” Pray for a wise tongue in your marriage today!

Wednesday: Hebrews 12:15 says, “Looking diligently lest any man fail of the grace of God; lest any root of bitterness springing up trouble you, and thereby many be defiled;” Pray you have peace with your husband so no root of bitterness springs up.

Thursday: Proverbs 15:1 says, “A soft answer turneth away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger.” When you forgive quickly, you can speak a kind word to turn the situation around! It works!!

Friday: Colossians 4:6 says, “Let your speech be always with grace, seasoned with salt, that ye may know how ye ought to answer every man.” Praying we are using grace in our marriages!!

Saturday: James 3:11 says, “Doth a fountain send forth at the same place sweet water and bitter?” Praying we have sweet speech with our spouse!

Sunday: Psalm 141:3 says, “Set a watch, O Lord, before my mouth; keep the door of my lips.” Praying today God helps us to put away sarcasm.


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Thank you for investing in your marriage and you too can have a happily ever married marriage!!

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